02 December 2010

I Am Bossy, Bossy, Bossy... or Am I Just Persistently Insistent?

Some women vehemently decry being called out of their name as the “B-word.”  I comparably loathe being called out of my nature as the other “B-word” aka Bossy.  And so I wrestle with my discontent at being called bossy several times a day for the past week as I tend my partner-in-process while she is recuperating from a temporary disability.

The way I see it... I am a bottom line now, get warm and fuzzy after business is taken care of kinda gal. Whether assuring her comfort specifically, or completing any task generally, my communication style is direct and succinct. She calls it “going for the jugular.” Hmmm.

The way I see it... I am most effective when I can respond with efficiency of effort aka following a to-do list, errands route, and layered tasks. An instance of each:  write out grocery list grouping items found in the same area of the store, before getting out of the house plan to run errands from the furthest point to the closest upon my return home (and preferably run errands only two days a week, completing them within a four hour period), and do laundry while sorting closet or warm pizza in oven while pulling holiday decorations from storage closet. I am not sure that she gets that I need to have a plan of action day-by-day that may accommodate diversions in an emergency, but not every addition to a plan constitutes a must-to-today.

The way I see it... when I am dependent on others or when others are dependent on my preparation and/or perspiration, then I have the responsibility to speak up, speak out, and take action to tend the best results. She calls me bossy.

No, she is not the first one to call me bossy. However, the same ones who call me bossy, call me, text me, write me, and expect me to be there when they need to have something done well, right, and swiftly.  Even when they “tease” and call me bossy with a smile on their faces I cringe -- feels more like they are calling me the other “B-word” with a cherry on top.

Just when I was about to get depressed and ired over this impish word, one I have grown to respect told me that he appreciates my “sweet persistent insistence” to care my partner-in-process through healing discomfort to wholeness.

Sweet persistent insistence.  No one can say that without smiling!


  1. I have had loved ones in the past to call me “bossy” or some have uttered the irritating playful phrase, “you’re so spoiled!” I used to cringe at being called spoiled and bossy; however, being the consummate optimist that I am, I attempted to turn these colorful adjectives into various acronyms. So the next time anyone calls you “bossy” consider this:

    B- Becoming: We all, are becoming, evolving, transitioning into the women, into the men, into the girls, into the boys that we should and we destined to be. When you call me, BOSSY, I am attempting to spark at BECOME the BEST in your spirit!!!!

    O- Optimistic: I am still optimistic that you can be better than you are at the present. If I did not care, I would not waste my energy by lifting my voice to get you to live up to a higher level of self -awareness.

    S- Splendor: I am a queen and as such, I expect nothing less than the Best. I live in splendor, magnificence and excellence. I not only expect and deserve the best but God has given me a desire to exist in the epitome of excellence. I expect and require this excellence from myself, and ALL, whom I have allowed in my sacred space.

    S-Sacredness: I adore the spirit of holiness that abides and comforts all of us. I am passionate about the spirit of God that resides in our: midst. Our every act, our every word, and our every deed have to be aligned with in order that our universal gifts will not be misaligned.

    Y- You: When you say I am BOSSY, I am expressing to you that I see so much more of you than you see in yourself. I desire that You become the ultimate person that God created you to be.

    This is my acronym for the word “bossy”, but feel free to make it unique to your situation. And may you continue to help those around you with the ministry of "sweet persistent insistence.

    Blessings my sista.

  2. What a loving and empowering affirmation of me to just do me! Love you back!

  3. If I hear someone say Raedorah is the "B" word - only beautiful would come to mind